Landscaping expensive? Fuggedaboutit!

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Landscaping your yard can be more affordable than you think

I was sitting with a friend the other day enjoying a cocktail. I’ll call him Vinnie (he might be in the witness protection program), and I asked him if he had seen our new website.

Vinnie: “Shua, I seen your site, but it looks like only a wise guy from Joisey could afford the stuff. All a dem bootiful patios and waterfalls and pergolas look expensive. Not fur nuttin,’ but how can the average schmo afford ta landscape his yahd?”

“Ey whassamatterforyou, ah?” I say, “Sure, on the website we have stuff that we’re really proud of. And we try to highlight the most beautiful landscapes we’ve done, but landscaping can be very affordable.”

“Let me tell you about this Xeriscape yard we did for a real nice lady on the West side:”

“Mrs. S. had dirt in her back yard and not a lot of money to spend on it. So she calls me. I go take a look at the yard. She wants a low maintenance yard, but she just doesn’t want to throw gravel back there and make it look like a prison yard. She doesn’t want to stumble on the rocks either. She has a lot of patio furniture and can’t afford to add to the existing concrete patio. She has a little dog and wants an area where the dog can do its business. And she didn’t want big trees to spoil the view of the city lights. And could we please install her pot fountain.”

“I gave the job to Doug Bishop, one of our architects. He drew a very nice plan with moderate to low water using plantings along the walls and crusher fines near the patio so that walking around the yard is easy. The crusher fines serve as an extension of her patio and she can set her chairs and tables on it without wobbling. We put in an automatic drip irrigation system so she wouldn’t have to hand water the plantings and showed her how to tap into it for when she wants to add more plants. Steel edging divides the different colored gravel and keeps them in place.”

“A couple of boulders and a cobble stone pattern around the pot fountain provide accents. The homeowner provided the lighting fixtures to spotlight the fountain. We built a concrete basin beneath the fountain to hide the water. A little area was built for where Mrs. S. was going to train her dog to go.”

“Mrs. S. was very pleased with the final results, and even happier about the price. The whole project was done for about $3000.00.”

Vinnie: “Getouttahere, you kiddin’ me? How can youse guys do such a bootiful job for that much?”

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you! Landscaping doesn’t have to cost a lot of money. You start with a good plan, and even if you can’t do it all at once you could still do it in phases.”

Vinnie: “So you gonna hook me up with a brudder-in-law deal like that too?”

“Sure Vinnie, anything you want.”

Vinnie, in the direction of the waitress: “Hey Toots, who do I gotta whack to get another drink, ah? Another round for me and my pally boy! We’re dyin’ a thirst over here! What are you some kind of bochagaloop?”

Disclaimer: No actual guidos were whacked in the writing of this post. Any resemblance to living jamokes, comparis, or goombas is purely coincidental, capeesh?